A San Francisco woman has revealed the detailed spreadsheet she once kept to document every single person she went on a date with.
Jenny, 31, has a clear interest in data tracking and analysis, and has applied it to her personal life in an unusual way: In a Google Sheets spreadsheet, she kept track of every single date she went on from a dating app, including information about the men, the number of times they went out, whether they had sex, and the quality of the dates.
She also admitted that she turned the data into graphs and charts, breaking down the apps where she most frequently found success on, the top reasons things didn’t work out, and how likely first dates are to turn into second dates.
Tracking: Before meeting her current boyfriend, Jenny, 31, kept a Google Sheets spreadsheet with details of every person she dated
Data is beautiful: An internet tech company employee based in San Francisco, she hoped to use the data to ‘find any insights, trends, and patterns from my dating app behavior’
Jenny, who works for an internet tech company and is currently in a relationship, and didn’t share what her boyfriend thinks of her old system — but her spreadsheet and resulting data have certainly interested TikTok users.
Details: She included heights, occupations, the app they met on, whether there was a connection, and the type of date they went on
‘When I first started online dating a couple years ago, I made this spreadsheet,’ she said in the first video she posted, back in December, which has been viewed over two million times.
‘Dating is exhausting,’ she added in a comment.
‘I was hoping I could use past data to help me find the right one.’
She shared a quick glimpse of the spreadsheet on the screen, showing the various categories she kept track of, like the man’s approximate height, his occupation, and the app they met on.
She also included her level of excitement to meet the date in person, the day they met, whether there was a connection, and the type of first date they went on (drinks, dinner, artsy).
In addition, she rated the quality of the first date on a scale of one to five, as well as the quality of the sex, if there was any.
Which app worked best? Jenny converted the data into graphs and charts to try to learn more about what worked and what didn’t work for her
Numbers: One pie chart broke down why she stopped seeing each person
Finally, she included the number of times they went out, as well as the ‘failure reason,’ or why she stopped seeing them.
Jenny then turned all of the information into graphs and charts because, she explained: ‘Data is beautiful.’
‘I did this to see if I could find any insights, trends, and patterns from my dating app behavior. I want to see if how much I looked forward to meeting someone had any impact on how the date actually went,’ she explained.
One pie chart showed the breakdown of which dating apps resulted in the most dates for her. She found that 36.8 per cent of her dates came from Tinder, 31.6 from Hinge, and 10.5 per cent each from The League, Bumble, and Coffee Meets Bagel.
However, she admitted she found no correlation between which app she used and whether the resulting date ended up being a good one.
She met her current boyfriend Hinge.
‘I also made a survival curve based on how first dates convert to second dates, convert to third dates,’ she said
She added: ‘I found for me, if I saw someone four times, I’m likely to see them 10+ times’
When graphing the difference between how excited she was to meet a date to how well the date went, she found that she was mostly on track — but there were some exceptions
‘I also made a survival curve based on how first dates convert to second dates, convert to third dates,’ she said. ”And I found for me, if I saw someone four times, I’m likely to see them 10+ times.’
Through her data, she learned that about 41 per cent of her first dates converted to second dates, but only about 20 per cent got past the third date.
Overall, one in ten men she met either became a boyfriend or was otherwise significant in her life.
The lesson here, she said, is a reminder that ‘dating is a bit of a numbers game.’
As for why different guys didn’t work out, she found that three-quarters of the time that she stopped seeing someone, it was from lack of attraction.
She logged 7.9 per cent as emotionally unavailable, 10.5 per cent as men who turned into platonic friends, and smaller percentages as men who moved too fast or dumped her.
Finally, she made up some graphs of less insightful data, like the heights men listed on their profile. The most, she found, said they were 5’10 — but she found that to be a lie.
Chill, people! Though some commenters called her ‘crazy,’ she pointed out that people track all sorts of things including sleep, calories, and steps
How tall? She made up some graphs of less insightful data, like the heights men listed on their profile. The most, she found, said they were 5’10 — but she found that to be a lie
Which day? Another graph showed her when she was most likely to schedule dates
Jenny’s video — as well as several follow-ups that went into greater detail about her graphs — have earned quite a bit of attention.
Though much of it was positive — including people who were impressed, found her humorous, or were curious for more information — some people were more mocking.
‘I got a lot of comments on my last video calling me crazy for logging my dating app data, but come on. We log our sleep, our calories, our steps,’ she said.
She also shared some of the wisdom she gathered that could help others.
When graphing the difference between how excited she was to meet a date to how well the date went, she found that she was mostly on track — but there were some exceptions.
In some cases, men she was ‘really looking forward to meeting [didn’t] pass the vibe check once I meet them in person.’
‘And some people who I’m kind of on the fence about meeting, not really excited going to it, end up surprising me,’ she added.
‘The spark is a myth and great chemistry can develop with some over time.’
Mollie Miller, who is based in New York, stunned TikTok by pulling out a pack of ‘sex cards’ and confessing that she had been using the bizarre organisational system for more than a decade
Last month, another woman on TikTok revealed she keeps index cards documenting every time she sleeps with someone.
New Yorker Mollie Miller pulled out her pack of ‘sex cards’ and confessed that she has been using the unusual system for more than a decade.
Each of the cards, which are filed in chronological order, include the partner’s name, the date, and a synopsis of what happened, like whether they both reached climax and whether she would see them again.
She has continued to read from these notes in a series she calls ‘Mollie’s Montage.’
In one recent video, Mollie said: ‘This one may be a little lame but it’s because I am still not over it.
‘I met this guy in June. He was a commercial fisherman, he got COVID tested weekly so he was like great.
After showing off her first stack of cards, Mollie has been sharing more in a video series, titled Mollie’s Montage, which has seen her read out one card per clip directly to camera
The TikTok sensation (left and right), who worked as a bartender in New York for nine years, ends all of her clips with ‘remember, always wear a condom’
‘We saw each other every two to three weeks and then he blocked me for a little while which was weird. And then he came back and he was like “I’m so sorry” and he said all the right things.
‘We spent a night in a hotel and the sex was really, really good. And then on November 6th I woke up to an Instagram message from a girl who I had never known and she asked me if I was sleeping with him.
‘And I said, “Yeah, I have been sleeping with him on and off for the last six months.”
‘She said, “I’m his girlfriend and I’ve been dating him for a year.” I was blocked and had no closure whatsoever but they’re still together.’
In another video, she shared how she met a guy at a tavern on November 14th, 2010,
‘Drunken attempt at sex. We fooled around and made out but he was too drunk to stay hard,’ she said. ‘That happened and then December 31st, 2010, met this guy at the tavern — different guy — and I took him home.
‘We fooled around in bed all day — it was great — and I started dating him.
‘January 11th, 2011, the second guy invited me over to his apartment and I found out that he was roommates with the first guy.’